MOTORING
Most popular makes of car have a main dealer on the Poligono Industrial El Fuerte in Ronda. Use Google to find yours.
Please note:
These are not paid-for listings. They are people we have used or know of from others, and who have a good reputation.
INDEPENDENT MECHANICS:
Antonio Bravo, Fuente de la Higuera 12, Ronda 651 86 98 40
Talleres San Marcos, Benaojan 952 16 77 47
TYRE SERVICES
Alineacion Ronda, C/ Sevilla 108, Ronda 952 872 750
Neumaticos Borja, C/ Guadalmedina 7, Ronda 637 99 82 14
BREAKER'S YARD
Desguace Gruas El Pino, Av. Ricardo Navarrete, 13, Ronda 952 87 74 00
PETROL STATIONS
Consistently the cheapest in Ronda are these three, all on the Poligono Industrial:
GEDS, SHELL and LA TORTUGA.
Benaojan is also competitive.
TAXIS
Alonso (Montejaque) 607 91 93 52
Rafael (Ronda) 687 70 82 05
Taxi Rank (Ronda) 952 874 080
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On the lookout for a new car?
By Joe King
Monday, May 8, 2023
If you’re thinking of buying a new car, be careful! You might end up with an off-road w**ker, a sh**ty sports car, a dungmobile or a car that doesn’t go, writes Joe King.
Yes, it’s true!
A Mitsubishi Pajero shouldn’t really sell at all in a Spanish-speaking country, because "pajero" means wanker, ie someone who masturbates. Yet this model, similar to a Shogun, is very popular all over Spain.
A Toyota MR2 has no place on a garage forecourt in France, because MR2 in French is pronounced “emmerdeux”, which, you guessed it, means shitty.
The Rolls Royce Silver Mist classic car had to be renamed in Germany, because "Mist" means dung, not the right image for such an expensive luxury car.
The Opel/Vauxhall Nova was renamed the Corsa for the Spanish-speaking market, simply because to describe a car by saying “it doesn’t go” is plain stupid.
Other celebrated faux pas have been the Mazda Laputa, because la puta is the Spanish for whore. This model was renamed in Spanish-speaking countries, though strangely not in the USA where Spanish is the second most-widely spoken language after English. Much to the amusement of many Hispanics.
The Fiat Marea didn’t sell well in Spanish-speaking markets either, since marea means sick, puke.
Volkswagen have had several dodgy moments with their model names over the years. Golf and Jetta were either daft or problematic in some markets, although they got away with "Käfer", the cult classic VW Beetle. I find Polo funny; the car with the hole in the middle (cf. Polo mints ad campaign).
So, bear all of this in mind when choosing a new car.
***
Moving away from cars, the Germans had a problem with Vick vapour rub, because of the pronunciation (“Fick” means f*ck!), so the spelling was changed for German-speaking markets to Wick, pronounced “Vick”.
Then we have Colon washing powder and Bimbo bread in Spain, Pschitt lemonade in France, not to mention ShitBegone toilet paper, Wack Off insect repellent and Minipussi snacks in China. Drinks named Sars, Cok, Erektus, and Fart hold little attraction for me, and as for Homo sausage and Shitto hot pepper sauce, well, I’d need MyFannie kitchen roll to mop up the sick!
Even where foreign language translations and cultural misunderstandings are not the issue, things can still go wrong. Take the unfortunate advertising slogan for vacuum cleaners in the USA: “Nothing sucks like an Electrolux”, or the relaunch a few years back of Reed Business News with the branding: “If it’s news to you, it’s news to us!”
I’m off now to “bite the wax tadpole”, the Chinese for (drink a) coca cola. No, seriously, back in 1928 that was the result of the company’s first attempt to find a suitable transliteration into Chinese characters for their product. Fortunately, and after much research, the name was changed to something which can be loosely translated as “happiness in the mouth”, which is much more palatable.
Happy motoring!
© Joe King
About Joe King
Joe, not his real name, is a bit of an enigma. He has lived in the Serranía de Ronda for many years, but prefers to fly under the radar.
He doesn’t take life too seriously, except in the case of Covid-19, but even there he can see the funny side.
He prefers to use a pseudonym and an anonimised photo.
Tags: Bimbo, Coca cola, Cok, Colon, Corsa, Electrolux, emmerdeux, Erektus, Fart, Fiat, Homo, Joe King, Laputa, Marea, Minipussi, Mist, Mitsubishi, MR2, MyFanni, Nova, Opel, pajero, Pschitt, puke, puta, Reed Business News, Rolls Royce, Sars, ShitBegone, Shitto, shitty, sick, Vauxhall, Volkswagen, VW, Wack Off, wanker, wax tadpole
